The Strangest Phone Call

From time to time I get calls from the office at the elementary school – most of the time they begin with “There’s no emergency, but…”, and the secretary will proceed to tell me that my 9yr old’s allergies are really acting up and maybe I should bring in some Benadryl, or my 10yr old had a bad spill on the playground and do I want to come check her out?  I know everyone at the school very well, and I’ve learned not to mess around with the calls – one time a “little rash” turned out to be a severe allergic reaction to penicillin and another time an “upset tummy” turned out to be a ruptured appendix.  So…I usually take a minute and pop over to the school to make sure everything’s a-ok.

Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, prepared me for today’s phone call.

Secretary:  Hi Mrs. X, there’s no emergency, but…um…your son approached the recess aide today and let her know that…well…he apparently forgot to put on some underwear this morning.  It appears that he’s…well…chaffing a little and would like you to bring him some underwear.  If you’re not too busy.

Me:  WHAT???

Secretary:  (laughing)

Me:  Well, I didn’t think to check that before he left the house this morning!  (more laughter from the secretary)  I’ll come right over.

I get to the office, and my son – who had been waiting for me in the nurse’s office – decided he didn’t want to miss PE today, so he asked the secretary to have me meet him on the field.  As I walk outside towards the field, I see the two recess aides and they see me.  And IMMEDIATELY they start busting out with laughter (I know them, too, so it was all good).  One of them shouted to me:  “Come see me before you leave!!”  (more laughter)

I caught up with my son’s class and the PE teacher and the teacher says to me, “Yeah, your son was a little late and I asked him if everything was ok.  He told me that he didn’t think he should tell me what was wrong – he said his mom would be here soon to take care of it.”

When I caught my son’s eye, he totally started cracking up.  Until that moment, I thought maybe he hadn’t really “forgotten” to put on some underwear, but that maybe he was just trying something new (he’s 6, I figured that was plausible) and it didn’t turn out to his liking.  But when he saw me and started blushing and giggling profusely, I realized that he really HAD forgotten, and he was feeling like one big silly ol’ goose.

I held out his underwear to show him that I was, in fact, there to save the day, and he whispers fiercly at me, “MOM, let’s go take care of this in private!!!”  He then ran back to his classroom to change in their bathroom.  I went to talk to the recess aides, and we all had a good laugh.  I guess the aide that called the office did so over the walkie-talkie system, so everyone had a good chuckle at my son’s expense.  Which, again, doesn’t really bother me too much because (1) we know everyone, and I know it’s a laughing “with us” and not “at us” sort of thing, and (2) because it is pretty funny!

My son ended his day feeling very much relieved and quite silly.  And I ended my day with yet another story about this goofy family of mine!

You might also enjoy these related posts from Tree, Root, and Twig:

1. Don't Call Me Julie
2. The Strangest Alphabet
3. This Double Life Doesn’t Come with a Phone Booth

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