Dear Texas State Official driving the white BMW (and I could totally put your license plate number here, because I *did* take it down),
Based on my observations during the unfortunate 15 minutes when I had the displeasure of driving behind, near, and around you today, I have some words of wisdom for you.
Perhaps you should NOT be on your cell phone while operating a motor vehicle, especially since it seems to make you:
The fact that you didn’t cause any accidents during those painfully long 15 minutes proves that God loves me more than he loves just desserts, though I’m not sure what the rest of your day will be like given your total inattention to the road. I can only pray for the other drivers around you.
You are driving a car, not a phone booth. HANG UP, MORON!
Sincerely,
Another driver whose time -and life! – is worth just as much as yours.
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